Thank you for sharing your journey, it was a beautiful read. My body perception changed when I had a baby. I carried huge and pushed him out posterior for 5 hours. I was like an Amazonian, I never knew I had that kind of strength in me. I have very real mental images of lying with my pelvis in the sky, feet above me on a bar at the end of the bed, and a hospital sheet wrapped around the bar and my arms so I could use every muscle in my body to get him out. Roaring bloody murder the entire time.
My body is different now, but every time I look at it and those negative thoughts creep in I think about just how strong it is and I'm proud.
This piece made me tear up bc you tapped into something very raw that I have struggled since I was a teenager. Even when I was in the Army and the fittest I ever was, I still felt fat. I hate that I'm now in my early 50s and still mostly hating the body who has carried me, mostly without complaint, through an amazing life. How do I stop or reprogram that awful voice in my head?
Katie this hurt my heart to hear. We never feel enough no matter how fit we are, how we small become, how successful we are! It makes me mad to think how many women spend their lifetimes hating their body and thinking they are not enough. I dont know it's life changing advice but I try think about my baseline, my goals. By most standards I dont do anything particularly impressive but compared to 6 months ago, 12 months ago I realise how far I have come and how freaking awesome I am. I dont think it's far to compare 25 year old Katia to 50 something year old Katia. But figuring out where you are now and where you want to be then be proud every fucking day x
I am so sorry hear you feel this way. It's easier said than felt but i hope you find a way to show your body and soul the kindness they deserve. All that energy poured into shame and self-loathing serves no one. That's how patriarchy and capitalism wants you to feel to rob you have joy- to make you think you are not enough. You are almost 65 fucking years old Mary! You have lived, survived and thrived girl....that's extra-ordinary. And even if today is day 1 of starting to learn to love your body then its a great day for it xo
Thank you for sharing your journey, it was a beautiful read. My body perception changed when I had a baby. I carried huge and pushed him out posterior for 5 hours. I was like an Amazonian, I never knew I had that kind of strength in me. I have very real mental images of lying with my pelvis in the sky, feet above me on a bar at the end of the bed, and a hospital sheet wrapped around the bar and my arms so I could use every muscle in my body to get him out. Roaring bloody murder the entire time.
My body is different now, but every time I look at it and those negative thoughts creep in I think about just how strong it is and I'm proud.
This piece made me tear up bc you tapped into something very raw that I have struggled since I was a teenager. Even when I was in the Army and the fittest I ever was, I still felt fat. I hate that I'm now in my early 50s and still mostly hating the body who has carried me, mostly without complaint, through an amazing life. How do I stop or reprogram that awful voice in my head?
Katie this hurt my heart to hear. We never feel enough no matter how fit we are, how we small become, how successful we are! It makes me mad to think how many women spend their lifetimes hating their body and thinking they are not enough. I dont know it's life changing advice but I try think about my baseline, my goals. By most standards I dont do anything particularly impressive but compared to 6 months ago, 12 months ago I realise how far I have come and how freaking awesome I am. I dont think it's far to compare 25 year old Katia to 50 something year old Katia. But figuring out where you are now and where you want to be then be proud every fucking day x
This is such a powerful article.
I have been body shamed since I was about 5 years old. I’m soon to be 65 and the shame, dread, judgement and self loathing continues to this day.
I am so sorry hear you feel this way. It's easier said than felt but i hope you find a way to show your body and soul the kindness they deserve. All that energy poured into shame and self-loathing serves no one. That's how patriarchy and capitalism wants you to feel to rob you have joy- to make you think you are not enough. You are almost 65 fucking years old Mary! You have lived, survived and thrived girl....that's extra-ordinary. And even if today is day 1 of starting to learn to love your body then its a great day for it xo